This story may not be copied, duped, elongated, distorted, rented, sold, sampled, printed on the side of a breakfast cerial packet or turned into a feature-length cartoon without prior arrangement and agreement with the author, so there. All characters are entirely non-corporeal and therefore would be classed as "made up" in a court of law. Any similarity with someone you know or have known is entirely coincidental and due to the interconnectedness of all things, small tedious rounding errors in the time/space continum and the over-consumption of far too many caffeine based products on your part and the part of the author and the sum of the parts of the other two sides. This does not effect your statutory rights. No animals were harmed.